Conversations with Cats

Keagan and CatCat, photo by Paige

Me: FayeFaye! Come here! I have some yummy raw salmon for you to try!


Keagan and CatCat: For us?!?


Me: No. For Faye. Go away, you two.


Faye: Um, I'm sorry, did you say I was suppose to eat that? You know, like food?


Me: Yes. It's salmon. Cats like salmon.


CatCat: Can I have it?


Me: No. Go away.


Keagan: Can I have it?


Me: No! Go away! Faye, eat this. You'll like it. I promise.


Faye: I am pretty sure that is not food. In fact, I'm not even certain it's dead. It may contaminate me.


Me: No, Faye, it's food!


Faye: Pull the other one, it's got bells on.


Keagan: If I can't have the salmon, maybe I'll just eat your leg instead.


Me: OWWWWW! Little F-er! GO AWAY!! NO! Faye! I didn't mean you! Come back and eat this stupid fish!


CatCat: Oh, she left. How sad for you.


Keagan: Nothing left for you to do now but set the fish down and walk away, lady.


CatCat: Yeah. Walk away, lady . . .


Me: I hate you all.

Faye, Hater of Salmon